To shop or not to shop ?!?

So who's team are you on anyway?

2009-02-07T12:46:00.001-05:00

I have decided to blog or shall I say bitch?

I guess its hard when you have a group of friends not to constantly be the point of some sort of gossip. But it really bugs me when it goes outside of the circle.

So I was out recently and out of the blue I got blind sided and was called out on something that I never thought would come out. Honestly what was said wasn't a huge deal but it was more of the principal of it. So I was honest about what was said, and in the end things seemed ok.

But seriousy I dont get the point of telling the person what was said. I mean did it benefit you in anyway? Or was it because there was a lack of conversation?

Well I guess I have learned for the lasttime. I am officially going to shut up on certain conversations.

TMI Tuesday

2008-10-15T16:37:00.001-04:00

TMI Tuesday #156 - Foresight
1. What do you do that sends a clear signal to your partner that you're interested in an intimate evening?
I like to touch a lot

2. How important is foreplay to an exciting evening?
Very it can make or break the sex in my opinion

3. What is the first thing you do during foreplay or what is the first thing you like done to you?
I love kissing and touching

4. Are you a one and done kind of partner (20 minutes or so) or do you like intimacy sessions longer than 60 minutes?
It depends on how the pace of things is going and whether or not I’m tired. I’m always up for more than 1 round lol.

BONUS: If you are interested in sex with a same-sex partner, what would be the first thing you'd like to touch on that other person, and why? (For those already in same sex relationships...what was the first thing you touched, or if you were interested in a relationship with the opposite sex, what would be the first thing you touched?)
I have to agree with Danielle on this one………….
Yeah, not interested in same-sex over here. I'm all about the penis. lol

I take it back!!!!

2008-10-14T10:16:00.001-04:00

I take back that whole bullshit post about Eric. I hate him!!!!!!!

He says that Im selfish I dont think so I just hated to be around you!!!!!

Better in time............

2008-10-10T15:05:00.000-04:00

Just like Danielle I’m taking a page from Leona Lewis and I know that things will get better in time.

I realized a few weeks ago that these lyrics are perfect for Eric and me. I even set it as his caller tune. I loved him but wasn’t happy and I needed to move on.

I don’t think of him often and when I do I’m mostly mad at him for some stupid stunt he has pulled or him just being a complete asshole. I know that I could never be with him at all again, we have done the back and forth too many times and have both done and said things that cant be taken back. We damaged our relationship equally, but he just never admitted how unhappy he was in fear of being alone. (My opinion anyway)

So I sit here today at work taking apart my wedding album and thinking at what such a difference a few years makes. (And people telling me how they are sorry that it didn’t work out the way I wanted) Looking at all the happy faces and the intimate pictures definitely does sadden me because we probably could have tried a lot harder than what we did, but both of us were too proud. And we are both still too proud to equally admit fault. And by the time he or I wanted to work on our issues it was too late. We had already started to feel bitter, betrayed, and unloved.

And with knowing all that why is it still so hard to move on or to let go? Does it really take half the time of the relationship to get over someone? I mean its been almost 1yr! Will I still be this way 3 more years from now? I know this year will probably be the hardest because it will be the first of the year of Holidays and Special events that aren’t shared by the 3 of us. Valentine’s Day didn’t bother me neither did my Birthday or Eric’s Birthday. It really started to hit home for Braydon’s Birthday. I don’t know what it was like for him not to have his parents together to celebrate his day. (And I don’t think that is something that will ever happen). Maybe I’m mostly sad for Braydon and what he has lost. Torn between the 2 people that he loves the most. And even more torn when we aren’t getting along and when we are trying to move on in our new relationships.

I don’t know how to fill the gap that an 8yr relationship left…. How many more tears can I shed over the same man? I’m done mourning this relationship and trying to figure out what the heck happened to us.

I have a wonderful boyfriend, and him and I have so much more in common. We aren’t afraid to share feelings and worries. We have great communication and tons of fun together. I think that I need to recondition myself to know what a healthy relationship is. And that what I was used too no longer applies. I’m not with Eric anymore.

With this being said I’m not going to relive the past that was known as Eric and Amanda. I will not participate in the conversations that start with “ remember when…” . I’m done remembering all the places that I have gone with Eric and all the things that we did either together or with other people.

It’s time for me to start to make new memories. It’s time for me to move on.

10-1

2008-10-08T16:43:00.001-04:00

10-1

Ten Things I Wish I Could Say to Ten Different People Right Now:

1. “ I quit”

2. “Mom, you are a miserable bitch”

3. “ Kfed please get your gums taken care of”

4. "Don't pretend you don't talk about me behind my back!"

5. “ Sorry, that your parents aren’t together Braydon”

6. “Thanks Mary for never judging me”

7. “I won powerball”
8. "I'll take large bills please."

9. “I will love you forever”

10. "Stop being fake”

Nine Things about Myself:

1. I’m love to shop and feel bad when I can’t

2. I look for reassurance about myself.

3. I am a good friend to my friends who are good to me.

4. I love to scrapbook

5. I would like to get married again and have more children.

6. I wish I didn’t hold onto the past.

7. I am constantly worried about money and bills.

8. I worry that Braydon wont have good values as he gets older.

9. I really do hate cleaning.

Eight Ways to Win My {Friendship} Heart:

1. Be Honest

2. Be fun.

3. Be understanding

4. Like the things that I like.

5. Don't make me feel dumb or less than you.

6. Know when to give advice.

7. Know when to just shut up and listen.

8. Be able to laugh with me about nothing and know exactly what we are laughing about.

Seven Things that Cross My Mind a Lot:

1. Bills

2. Braydon

3. My Dad

4. My Future

5. Better Job

6. Was it really me?

7. What do my friends really think about me sometimes?

Six Things I Do Before I Fall Asleep:

1. Have sex lol

2. Brush my teeth/shower

3. put braydon to bed

4. Set my alarm clock

5. watch tv

6. turn off light

Five People Who Mean a Lot (in no particular order, ok so I cheated and lumped some into groups, my bad):

1. Parents

2. Braydon

3. Close relatives

4. Closest friends

5. Chris

Four simple pleasures:
1. pj’s and a couch
2. comfort foods
3. cuddling
4. piece and quiet

Three Songs/Bands/Artists I Listen to Often:

1. Maroon 5

2. Lifehouse

3. 3 Doors Down

Two Things I Want to Do Before I Die:

1. Travel

2. Be happy in every aspect of my life

One Confession:
I’m scared that I don’t do enough for Braydon

Survey

2008-09-23T14:15:00.000-04:00

Survey
Start with your name:
Amanda
If your ex REALLY needed you at 3 am, would you go to his/her house? I highly doubt it.

When was the last time you wanted to punch someone in their face? HHHmm it has been maybe a few weeks

What are the last three things you spent money on?
1) Overdraft fees
2) Water/salad
3) Gas

What was the last thing you cried about? I haven’t cried in awhile

Could you go a day without eating?
No friggin way!

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with a J?
Yes

Has anyone ever told you they're in love with you?
Yes

When was the last time you were disappointed?
Today when I looked at my bank balance.

Has a girl ever seriously punched you?
I don’t think so/ slapped maybe

What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
Water

Have you kissed two different people in one night?
Yes.

Is it easy for others to make you feel awkward?
Sometimes.

Are you taller than 5'4"?
yes I sure am

Over the past week have you felt stupid?
No

What's the age difference between you and the last person you kissed?
7 months

Have you ever been outside completely naked?
Yes.

What would happen if you had a baby with the last person you kissed?
I would cry because I cant afford it, then I guess I would have to get over it

Who did you text the most yesterday?
Chris

What were you doing at 10pm Friday night?
I don’t frickin remember? Maybe watching tv?

What are your plans for today?
Work, Home, Chris apt to move some stuff, talk to bob with Mary, bed

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
Yup

What was the last reason you went to the doctor for?
A gyno appointment

What is the last thing you yelled aloud?
”Pay attention” at Braydon of course

What do you think of when you think of Australia?
Surfing

Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?
yes

Have you ever kissed the last person you texted?
yes

What's one action you do when you're really nervous?
look down

Would you rather give up the computer or the TV?
tough call

Do you find yourself saying mean things to people over the internet that you wouldn't say to their face?
sometimes, because it is easier to write then to say

One word that explains perfectly how you feel at the moment?
bored

What did the last text message you received say?
that sux

Do you care if people hate you for no reason?
Yes, it bothers me

How hard is your life right now?
Hard financially

Have you ever taken anyone for granted?
yes

2008-07-23T12:42:00.002-04:00

Yay tagged!!! ;o)

Pretty basic, list 5 things for each group ;o) Let me know if you played!

5 things found in your bag:

1-lipgloss
2-Cell phone – can’t leave home without it!
3-lighter( for the occasional smoke)
4-wallet
5-tampons!!!!!

5 favorite things in your room:

1-the nightstand (wink wink lol)
2-TV-can’t live without it!
3- jewelry
4-my clothes
5- my IHome

5 things you have always wanted to do:

1- have a storybook kind of life
2- go to ITALY
3-be debt free
4- own my own business
5- own horses

1-being the best mom I can be, so much harder than I ever imagined and so much more rewarding than I could have imagined as well ;o)
2-getting back to scrapbooking
3-REDSOX!!!!!!
4-summer concerts :o)
5-clothes( enuf said)

Sam told me to do I's

2008-07-01T15:48:00.002-04:00

I am : Tired of being bored at work.
I think : Eric is an asshole.
I know : That things will get better in the future.
I want : To be debt free and start over with a clean slate.
I have : spend more time with Braydon.
I wish : that things could have been different.
I hate : that Im already divorced at 28.
I miss : being carefree and having no responsibilities.
I fear : that Braydon wont grow up to be a respectable man..
I feel : I need to try harder.
I hear : Stupid Ingrid!!
I smell : Chris’ donut.
I crave : to have more normalcy in my life..
I search : for myself.
I wonder : I will ever create a good family for Braydon.
I regret : I let myself be controlled for so long.
I love : being able to laugh with Braydon..
I ache : for him when he asks if his father will move back home.
I am not : going to be pushed around.
I believe : all good things come to those who wait.
I dance : like a fool to entertain Braydon.
I sing : because I think I’m good lol.
I cry : in the shower.
I don't always :do whats right.
I fight : because I’m stubborn
I write : not enough.
I win : at being funny!
I lose : my mind when stressed.
I never : go skiing lol
I always : try to have fun in life..
I confuse : myself. I am blonde.
I listen : to everyone.
I can usually be found : at work or at home
I am scared : that I won’t be able to provide for Braydon by myself even when Eric helps.
I need : money!!!
I am happy : with how things seem to be going today.
I imagine : that I will eventually have a good home and family.

Past, Present, Future

2008-06-09T13:40:00.003-04:00

So just when I think that my life is heading in a positive direction despite all that I have going on. It just isnt going to happen......the past with always haunt and dictate who you are I guess. No matter how you have made an effort and changed and discovered who you really are. The mistakes will never go away. And someone will always be there to judge you on it. You become tainted, your image is no longer what they saw and it never will be. Apologies mean nothing, promises of change mean nothing. So what is the point of making mistakes and calling them that if you will never be forgiven? You think that if you tell someone everything that they would understand and appreciate that, dispite of your faults and flaws that you are proving to them that you want the honesty and trust to be there. But no one thinks that way, they just look at you now waiting for you to screw up. Not taking in that you are human and make poor decisions and mistakes....

Thought I had gotten it right this time..... I dont want to go back to the drawing board, I thought I had already drawn my picture this time. And it was a good one, one I could be proud of and show to everyone....

I guess I will just have to come to terms that I will never get away from my past......it will always be my present.

Musical Tag

2008-05-23T12:19:00.004-04:00

Musical Tag

Here are the rules: List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they are any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.

1. Jordin Sparks- No Air
2. Ray J- Sexy Can I
3. Fleetwood Mac- Silver Springs
4. Britney Spears- Gimme More
5. Linkin Park- Bleed it out
6. Hart- Listen to your heart
7. Akon-New song

I tag nobody since I have 4 blogger friends that were already tagged........

Easter Pics

2008-03-28T16:40:00.003-04:00

Musical Survey

2008-03-20T16:44:00.002-04:00

Musical Tag... you're it!!!

Here are the rules: List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they are any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.

1. 3 Days Grace/ Never Too Late

2. Shoulda Let You Go/ Keysha Cole

3. Fake It/ Seether

4. When you look me in my eyes/ JONAS BROTHERS

5.SEE YOU AGAIN/ MILEY CYRUS

6. WHAT HURTS THE MOST / CASCADA

7. NEVER AGAIN / KELLY CLARKSON

2008-03-10T15:08:00.004-04:00

2008-03-10T15:08:00.001-04:00

2008-03-10T15:04:00.001-04:00

SURREAL LIFE

2008-03-03T10:25:00.001-05:00

I HAD A VERY SURREAL WEEKEND TO SAY THE LEAST.

I HAVENT HAD A LOT OF EXTRA CASH TO DO MUCH WITH BRAYDON, SO WITH THE BONUSES WE GOT ON FRIDAY I PAID SOME EXTRA BILLS AND FIGURED I’D TAKE BRAYDON OUT. SO WE WENT TO CHILI’S, AND I HAVE TO SAY MY SITUATION HIT ME LIKE A TON OF BRICKS. AS IM SITTING THERE WITH HIM WAITING TO GET A SEAT, ALL THESE FAMILIES WERE WALKING IN AND WALKING OUT. I FLET LIKE I STUCK OUT LIKE A SORE THUMB. FOR THE FIRST TIME I REALIZED THAT I AM REALLY ALONE WITH HIM. AND EVEN THOUGH ERIC AND I WERE FAR FROM A NORMAL HAPPY FAMILY, AND A LOT OF IT WAS LIES AND FAKE. IT WAS STILL THE 3 OF US.

IT WAS THE STRANGEST FEELING JUST SITTING THERE WITH BRAYDON, AND WATCHING HIM COLOR, AND I FELT LIKE PEOPLE WERE JUST LOOKING AT ME. IM SURE MOST OF IT WAS MY IMAGINATION. BUT HONESTLY I CANT SEE MY SELF DOING THAT OFTEN. I KNOW I WANTED OUT OF THIS MARRIAGE FOR A LONG TIME, BUT I DIDN’T THINK THAT I WOULD MISSTHE FAMILY PART OF IT. AND I MISS IT MOSTLY FOR BRAYDON. I WANT TO HAVE A FAMILY FOR HIM AGAIN SOMEDAY, SOMETHING THAT WE CAN BOTH BE A PART OF.

I WAS TALKING TO MY FRIEND AMY ABOUT IT, AND SHE SAID THAT EVEN THOUGH SHE NEVER HAD A FAMILY WITH HER DAUGHTERS FATHER IT STILL FEELS THE SAME, AND THAT ITS SOMETHING THAT YOU NEVER REALLY GET USED TOO. I GIVE HER AND MY FRIEND SAM KUDOS FOR DOING IT ON THEIR OWN. MAYBE IT’S WORSE FOR ME SINCE I HAD A “FAMILY” TO GO TO EAT WITH AND THE MOVIES, AND OTHER THINGS THAT YOU WOULD DO AS A FAMILY. BUT NOW I FIND MYSELF DOING IT FOR THE SAKE OF BRAYDON. EVEN AT NIGHT WHEN IT IS JUST HIM AND I, I KNOW THAT SOMETHING IS MISSING. I DEFINITELY DON’T MISS ERIC, BUT I MISS HAVING SOMEONE THERE FOR ME AS A COMPANION. SOMEONE ELSE SITTING ON THE COUCH OR SOMEONE ELSE THAT WILL BE EATING DINNER WITH US, AND TALKING TO US.

I JUST HOPE THAT IT WILL GET EASIER OVER TIME, AND THAT BRAYDON AND I WILL BE OKAY WITH JUST EACHOTHER.

I ALMOST FORGOT!!!!!

2008-02-28T09:45:00.001-05:00

OH AND LYSS I REALLY DONT THINK I WANT TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH SOMEONE LIKE YOU..... YOUR FRIENDS ARE WAY TOO IMMATURE, AND TO BE HONEST I NEVER REALLY LIKED YOU SINCE CVS. IT TAKES EVERY EFFORT I HAVE NOT TO LAUGH AT YOU TO YOUR FACE. AND THE ONLY REASON YOU WERE ALLOWED INTO OUR GROUP WAS BECAUSE SAM LET YOU IN.

Grow the fuck up, and keep your opinions to yourself

2008-02-28T09:24:00.000-05:00

Ok I don’t know why people feel the need to put in their fucking 2 cents, when their opinion isn’t even worth that much. Maybe I shouldn’t have referenced lyss as knowing what im kind of going through. Because the way she handled it verses the way I am are completely different. She fucked a bunch of dudes as soon as matt was out of the door. Got sloppy drunk and had to be carried more times than I care to remember. And thought everyone of the guys she banged was the “one”. Let some strange dude that hangs out with a cokehead sleep in her bed with her daughter. And he is clearly an alcoholic, nice choice. So next time you think about bringing “ bob” up maybe you should take a look in the mirror, but do it fast before it breaks. At least “ bob” cant wake up in the middle of the night and molest your little girl.

Jen you are a whole other story. I don’t know you, don’t care to know you, and if my name or my friends names comes out of your fuckin fat mouth or is typed out of your chubby fat bastard fingers. I will find you and shove a chicken bone down your fucking throat while I smash your head into the table. And trust me I may seem nice and innocent, but you better watch your back. You know what they say about the quiet ones…. they are the worst. And if you don’t believe me ask lyss about the vandalism that was done to someone’s car, just for blocking my driveway. Ill give you a hint the car was considered totaled.

So next time you want to pretend to be me in a blog you better, have great hair, skin, be tall and wear a size 6, and not have rolls or a gray fuckin tooth and laugh like a pack of hyenas.

Completely a vent I needed

2008-02-20T15:30:00.001-05:00

This is definitely going to be a ranting blog. I have several topics to get off my chest. Some of it may sound harsh, and if you think you are the one im referencing, you might be right. But also try not to take it too heart. I still cherish each one of you in my life.

First off I am obviously going through a divorce, which I wish could be civil, but I also knew that this wasn’t going to happen with Eric. And I have had support from my family and friends during this, which I appreciate. On the other hand I think some friends and family have crossed the lines at some point.

Love that the people are willing to play the go between for Eric, and me even though I know he is making a pain of himself. But on the other hand he doesn’t need to know when im not at work. Especially when Im in court filing a motion against him. Nothing like giving him the heads up. What I do with my lawyer and in my life now is none of his business. He will find out what im doing through his lawyer. Then when he tells you that Im home when Im not…oh sorry I didn’t know Eric was your BFF to trust and believe everything he says. I thought he was just the supplier. And in this circle of friends that we have. Not a single god damned one of us can say we have NEVER lied or refrained from telling the whole story to each other. Because that is living in fucking LA LA land. Not reality.

There have been a few times when I found out I have been lied to or caught a whiff of bullshit. But never gave anyone the third degree or tried to call them out on it, especially if it was a friend. Id always like to give the opportunity for that person to just come clean on his or her own time.

And I welcome the advice that Ive been given but I don’t need to be picked apart about it. I know I have to adjust my lifestyle, but it’s a little hard to do when nothing has been hashed out yet. Some of my friends hate being compared to our other friends because while the result of their situation is the same, the whole process and living situation is different. Well same with me. Not a single person that I am close with has been through the same exact situation as me. I can think of only one person and that would be Alyssa, and even then some things are different.

This is going to be a huge lifestyle change for me, and im well aware of it. And I know my friends want to protect me from making bad choices. But just like a teenager, I need to learn for myself. I don’t need another mother or father, I have some already.
When a few of my friend weren’t getting child support or help. I didn’t say damn maybe you shouldn’t buy that, or you might be over extending your self…………that’s just insulting. If they wanted to complain about money and bills I would let them, and just say that it sucks. I wouldn’t tell them that they should cease all spending and lock your self inside the house. Because for the most part I know my friends are responsible people, and even responsible people make mistakes on bills or become overdrawn on the bank account.

I guess I just expected that I would get the same respect that is given. And if people feel that Im not being completely honest, maybe they should reflect on themselves. Because if I thought someone was completely trustworthy and non- judgmental I wouldn’t hold back.

I just don’t want this to create anymore of a mess then I feel it already has. And I definitely don’t want this to create any fights or loss of friends.

SURVEY

2008-02-12T15:03:00.001-05:00

A survey!
1. How many people have you kissed in the past 12 months? 3

2. Have you ever done anything illegal? Just your usual pot smoking, drunk driving, and tasting some snow.

3. Would you rather spend a whole day with your mom or your dad? My Dad. My Mom and I clash too much.

4. Where will you be 12 hours from now? Sleeping

5. Is it easy for others to make you feel awkward? It depends on who and what the situation is

6. Do you know what you are going to wear tomorrow? Nope not yet

7. Who do you wish you were with right now? Hhmm realistically Chris, unrealistically Paul Walker

8. Is it easy for people to make you smile? Yup

9. Does anyone hate you for no reason? Probably someone usually does. Right now I would say eris new girlfriend

10. Can you make yourself cry? Yes

11. How many hours of sleep did you get last night? about 6

12. Is your life simple or complicated? Complicated

13. Would you go back in time if you were given the chance. YES I would go back to when I met eric and let him take over my life and when I quit school.

14. Have you ever been too drunk to remember anything? yes

15. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? alot

16. Do you know anyone who lives in Wyoming? No

17. Have you ever kissed someone whose name starts with a C? Yes

18. Have you ever been out past curfew? Too old to have a curfew

19. What are you doing tomorrow? Relaxing

20. Are you easily confused? Sometimes

21. Do you think you would make a good parent? Im a parent right now, and I hope im doing a good job

22. What is your favorite kind of ice cream? Fish food

23. What was your last place of employment? Before Swarovski, it was Ferrell gas

24. Are you taller than 5 foot 4 inches? yes

25. Have you ever liked someone who treated you like crap? Yes

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? I haven’t had my real hair color since I was 18.

27. What color are your socks? No socks

28. Has anyone ever borrowed something from you and never returned it? Yup

29. Do you fall for people easily? Somewhat, I try to refrain.

30. True or False: Everything happens for a reason. TRUE.

31. Have you ever dated someone more than once? No

32. Who have you texted today? Chris

33. When and what was the reason behind the last time you cried? Like 3 weeks ago when I saw eric’s chic running out of my house.
34. Have you ever liked anyone on your myspace? Yes I have some old boyfriends on there

35. Do you find members of the opposite sex confusing? They are more confusing than we are, that's for sure.

36. Is there anybody you wish you could be with right now? Yes

37. When is the last time you saw a big group of friends? Well I guess it depends what a big group is
38. What are you listening to right now? nothing

39. How has the week been? Long and busy

Lyrics on My Mind............

2008-01-30T10:01:00.000-05:00

Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting

I'm through, with doubt,
There's nothing left for me to figure out,
I've paid a price, and i'll keep paying

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

I know you said
Why can't you just get over it,
It turned my whole world around
and i kind of like it

I made by bed, and I sleep like a baby,
With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
It's a sad sad story
That a mother will teach her daughter
that she ought to hate a perfect stranger.
And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting

" Life sucks then you die"

2008-01-18T15:01:00.000-05:00

I often wonder how different my life would be if i would have just stayed at home and living with my mom and sister. nope instead i had to be a bad ass and move out on my own at the age of 18. It was interesting at first lived with a b/f for 3 months then got my own place, and it was decent. Rent was only $350.00 a month. Well now Im here with a 5yr old son a house and more animals than i care to mention, and lets not forget a questionable husband. My whole life I never went for the bad boy type or even the homies, and here i am wondering how in the hell i chose Eric.
He's not a homie, but he isnt a brillant preppy type either. Everything was great at first, the butterflies everytime you talk, the constant phone calls throughout the day. And even after all that you are still excited to see eachother at the end of the day. We used to lay in bed talking for hours before actually going to sleep. it was nice.

how soon we forget those days and fall into our daily routines. before you know it the butterflies fade, the calls are few and far between. and the excitement turns into resentment. why does this happen, or why do we let it happen? is it that hard to just be honest with ourselves and the ones we chose to love? and after eight year and all the deceit and tears how do you get it back? Is it easier to just throw in the towel? Does the other person in the relationship care to try? Myabe it was my mistake to not take the opporunity when it was presented to fix it, and now that things are hitting me instead of him im hitting the panicbutton. Am I finally realizing what I was risking and what I was giving up on?

I wish I could go back to those earlier days and freeze time. I wish we could have a Ghost from relationships past, instead of a ghost from christmas pasts. It would be nice it we could all be reminded what it was about eachother that we loved. But I guess all we have is a Counselor for Relationships Present, and just hope that this will humble us to how we got to where we are.

time to catch up

2007-12-10T14:45:00.000-05:00

OK, SO I HAVE SERIOUSLY SLACKED OFF ON MY BLOG. AS YOU ALL KNOW SINCE MY LAST ENTRY I HAVE GOTTEN BACK WITH ERIC AND MOVED HOME. OF COURSE CONDITIONS FOR THAT WERE FOR HIM TO BE MEDICATED, AND CONTINUE COUNSELING. SO FAR SO GOOD. OF COURSE EVEN THOUGH HE IS MEDICATED WE STILL GET ON EACH OTHERS NERVES. BUT NO TYPE OF MEDS WILL EVER FIX THAT. NOT UNLESS HE IS IN A COMA.

OK SO ENOUGH OF THAT, STILL TALKING TO OLDIE. HE IS MY ADDICTION. SOME PEOPLE CHOOSE METH, COKE, WEED. I CHOOSE SEX WITH A GUARANTEED ORGASM. LOL NOW IF YOU ASK ME THAT'S A GOOD ADDICTION.

OTHER THAN GETTING READY FOR THE HOLIDAYS NOTHING ELSE IS REALLY GOING ON. GOING TO NEW YORK THIS SATURDAY WITH MY GIRLS. SO THAT SHOULD BE FUN. BETTER MAKE SURE I HAVE ENOUGH BATTERIES FOR MY CAMERA.

WELL I HAVE TO GET BACK TO WORK. TTYAL

drama dram

2007-10-22T16:05:00.001-04:00

SO THIS WEEKEND WAS MY FIRST WEEKEND UNATTACHED TO ERIC....I HAVE TO SAY I DO FEEL RELIEVED AND STAYING AT MY MOMS HOUSE ISNT AS BAD AS I THOUGHT. I DO SOMETIMES MISS THE COMFORT OF MY OWN HOUSE...LIKE MY BED AT HOME IS WAY MORE COMFY, AND WE HAVE MORE TV'S SO NO SHARING WITH OTHER PEOPLE IN THE HOUSE...

IF ANYONE HAS AN EXTRA TV THEY WANT TO GET RID OF LET ME KNOW..... I HAVE CABLE IN MY ROOM, BUT NO TV :(

OF COURSE I HAVEN'T BEEN COMPLETELY FREE OF ERIC.. I MEAN I STILL HAVE TO TALK WITH HIM BECAUSE OF BRAYDON, BUT WHEN I DO TALK TO HIM HE ALWAYS WANTS TO DISCUSS MY DECISION.

I'M TIRED OF REPEATING MYSELF...JUST LET ME HAVE MY SPACE, AND THEN WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT ILL TELL YOU IM NOT GOING BACK..I JUST WANT TO MAKE THIS ADJUSTMENT FOR BRAYDON SMOOTHER. HE SEEMS TO BE OK WITH SLEEPING AT MY MOMS WITH ME, BUT ON THE OTHER HAND HE MOSTLY WANTS TO GO HOME WITH ERIC BECAUSE THATS WHERE HIS THINGS ARE...SO I FEEL LIKE IM THE ONE THAT HAS LOST CUSTODY.
IM SURE THAT THINGS WILL GET BETTER AT LEAST I HOPE SO..

ERIC HAD HIM SATURDAY NIGHT AND I WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE HIM SUNDAY...BUT NOPE HE WANTED TO STAY WITH ERIC..

SO I WILL HAVE HIM TONIGHT. AND THEN I GUESS WE WILL JUST KEEPING PASSING BACK AND FORTH FOR AWHILE…

ANYWAY THAT’S ALL I HAVE FOR NOW………

TILL NEXT TIME

2007-09-25T11:15:00.001-04:00

You Are a Feminine Beauty!

You make any guy feel like a man, simply by standing next to him
You have a classic womanly appeal - and you've got a look for every occasion
This doesn't mean that you can't kick back in (designer) jeans and sneakers
You just prefer to be girly and sweet as often as possible

What Type of Beauty Are You?

Applepicking

2007-09-25T09:03:00.000-04:00

OLDIE BUT GOODIE

2007-08-29T13:46:00.000-04:00

CONCERT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!!

2007-07-17T14:05:00.000-04:00

SO FRIDAY WAS THE DAUGHTRY/STAIND/NICKELBACK CONCERT. IT WAS AWESOME. STARTED THE DAY OUT WITH HAVING A HALF DAY AT WORK. SO I WAS OUT OF HERE AT 12 IN THE AFTERNOON. DID SOME ERRANDS AND HOUSE WORK. THEN SAM,KAYLA AND I LEFT A LITTLE AFTER 4 TO GO TO WRENTHAM TO MEET EVERYONE ELSE AT JENNY'S MOMS HOUSE. FROM THERE WE PICKED UP SOME OF MIKE'S FRIENDS AND HEADED TO TWEETER CENTER. WE PARKED IN THE PRIVATE LOT, WHICH WAS SO MUCH EASIER TO GET OUT OF. MIKE MANED THE GRILL WHILE WE ALL BULLSHIT AND DRANK......TOOK A NATURE WALK TO TALK TO BOB. UNFORTUNATELY, NOT ALL OF US HAD THE SAME SEATS....SO SAM, BECKY AND I SAT ALONE, BUT THATS WAS FINE AS USUAL WE MADE OF PEOPLE, DRANK AND TALKED TO BOB ALOT........LOL

OVER YOU!!!!!!!!

2007-07-13T11:38:00.000-04:00

YOU REMIND ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-07-13T11:33:00.001-04:00

EVERYTHING CHANGES!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-07-13T11:27:00.000-04:00

OUT TO PLAY.......

2007-07-12T15:01:00.000-04:00

WELL I GUESS I SHOULD BLOG ABOUT LAST WEEKEND BEFORE THIS WEEKEND APPROACHES.

FRIDAY WAS A GOOD NIGHT. I CELEBRATED MY FRIEND MARY'S 26TH BIRTHDAY. IT WAS ORIGINALLY SUPPOSED TO BE 8 OF US, BUT IT SLOWLY DWINDLED DOWN TO JUST 3 OF US (ME,MARY, AND DANIELLE). I MET THEM AT MARY'S HOUSE IN PROV. AND WE SIPPED SOME HOME MADE SANGRIA THAT DANIELLE MADE. THEN OFF TO SOME DINNER AT ANDREAS ON THAYER ST. THEY HAVE THE BEST GREEK FOOD EVER. WE SHARED SOME APPETIZERS AND DRANK 2 BOTTLES OF WINE. THEN WE WALKED DOWN TO CARTERBAR HAD A DRINK THERE, BUT THAT PLACE WAS FILLED WITH GIUDOS ( NOT SURE IF THATS SPELLED RIGHT)AND FAKE TIT SLUTTY GIRLS..........

SO THEN WE ARE ON OUR WAY TO MCFADDENS, BUT MARY GETS A CALL FROM A CO-WORKER, AND WE DECIDED TO MEET THEM AT DeJaVu. WE SPENT THE REMAINDER OF OUR EVENING THERE DANCING AND BEING ABSOLUTELY RETARDED AT TIMES. BUT ALL IN ALL A GOOD NIGHT..NO HUSBANDS OR BOYFRIEND TO WATCH OVER US, AND WE GOT TO LET LOOSE.......WHICH YOU ALL KNOW I LOVE GOING OUT WITHOUT ERIC!!!!!!!!!!! ILL POST SOME PICS EVEN THOUGH YOU PROBABLY ALREADY SAW THEM ON MYSPACE......

HAVE A GOOD DAY!!

TIME TO PLAY BALL............

2007-07-11T12:41:00.000-04:00

Well I haven't blogged in awhile. So I thought a nice slow Wednesday would be good for it.
On July 2nd I went to my first Red Sox game at Fenway Park. I twas beautiful outside and even after the sun went down it was comfortable. I have to say that the worst part was the train ride and hopping from subway to subway. We grabbed some beers and some appetizers at Boston Billiards. Then of course you know I had to hit some of the shops for some RedSox gear..........lol at Eric's expense. And then we were off to the game!!! Are seats were pretty good for 40 bucks, we were in right field. I will post pics for you all to see. Eric was good during the game ,we drank and peed alot lol. All was good until he got cocky at the end of the night with making sure we had the right time for the train to go home. He's such an idiot giving people who are trying to help him attitude. So we didnt talk the whole 45mins waiting for the train. He was a drunkin fool. But thats is what he's best at. I told him next time I would go with Mary or something, and he said that maybe next time I should take my boyfriend...........I was thinking if I had one I would.

2007-07-10T13:10:00.001-04:00

Your Name....

Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following. They MUST be real places, names, things etc.NOTHING made up! If you cant think of anything, skip it. Try to use different answers if the person before you had the same 1st initial. You CANNOT use your name for the boy/girl name question. Have fun!

Your Name: AMANDA

1. Famous Singer/Band: AEROSMITH

2. 4 letter word: ARTS

3. Street: ALICE ST

4. Color: AMBER

5. Gifts/Presents: ANKLET

6. Vehicle: ACURA

7. Things in a Souvenir Shop:

8. Boy Name: AARON

9. Girl Name: ALAYSIA

10. Movie Title: AMERICA BEAUTY

11. Drink: AMARETTO AND MILK

12. Occupation: ARTIST

13. Celebrity: ANNA NICOLE( R.I.P)

14. Magazine:

15. U.S. City: ALEXANDRIA

16. Pro Sports Teams: A'S

18. Reason for Being Late for Work: ANXIETY

19. Something You Throw Away: ASHES

20. Things You Shout: ASSHOLE

21. Cartoon Character: AVATAR

2007-07-09T14:54:00.000-04:00

I got this Sexy Comment from CommentsDump.com!

I got this Sexy Comment from CommentsDump.com!

2007-07-09T11:30:00.000-04:00

You are The Fool

The Fool is the card of infinite possibilities. The bag on the staff indicates that he has all he need to do or be anything he wants, he has only to stop and unpack. He is on his way to a brand new beginning. But the card carries a little bark of warning as well. Stop daydreaming and fantasising and watch your step, lest you fall and end up looking the fool.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

2007-07-05T15:55:00.001-04:00

"I'm always workin' slavin' every day, Gotta get away from the same old same old"

2007-07-03T09:36:00.000-04:00

OK SO I HAD AN UNEVENTFUL NIGHT...CAME HOME ERIC WAS MAKING TACO FOR DINNER,AND BRAYDON WAS RUNNING AROUND THE HOUSE.
I TOOK A CAT NAP ON THE COUCH AFTER I ATE.. I WAS WIPED OUT, MUST BE FROM SATURDAY NIGHT POISON CONCERT. I ONLY SLEPT FOR ABOUT 40 MIN, BUT I DID FEEL A HELL OF ALOT BETTER. I WATCHED ALL MY CHILDREN WHILE GETTING MY WORK CLOTHES READY (WE GET TO WEAR JEANS ALL WEEK BECAUSE OF JULY 4TH) SO THAT'S EXCITING FOR ME BECAUSE I LOVE JEANS. I DID WATCH BIG LOVE, WHICH I WILL HAVE TO CONSULT WITH SAM ABOUT. WE ALWAYS TALK ABOUT THAT USUALLY A TUESDAY OR WEDNESDAY RITUAL.....NOT SURE IF SHE WATCHED IT LAST NIGHT BECAUSE OF JAZZ.
SO I FINALLY GOT THE POISON PICS POSTED AS YOU CAN SEE BELOW..........GOOD TIMES.

I'M LEAVING WORK EARLY TODAY TO GO TO MY FIRST RED SOX GAME. THAT'S' RIGHT FOLKS I'M POPPING MY FENWAY CHERRY LOL!
HOPEFULLY ERIC DOESN'T GET US LOST IN BOSTON, AND DECIDE TO WALK HOME ON THE TRAIN TRACKS.......JK LOL SO ILL PICS OF THAT AND 4TH OF JULY ON THURSDAY.

WELL THAT'S ABOUT ALL I HAVE FOR TODAY!!!

POISON PICS, FINALLY!!!

2007-07-03T09:09:00.000-04:00

"Oh my god look what the cat dragged in"

2007-07-02T16:42:00.000-04:00

OK SO IM TRYING TO LOAD POISON PICTURES ,AND THIS BLOGGER THING WON'T LET ME....

SO I GUESS I:LL HAVE TO DO IT TOMORROW.

ANYWAYS THE CONCERT WAS GOOD EXCEPT FOR ERIC BEING THERE. BUT HE USUALLY PUTS A DAMPER ON MY NIGHTS WITH THE GIRLS ANYWAY. BUT WHY BUY A TICKET AND COME JUST TO STAND THERE LIKE A BUMP ON A LOG? NO HEAD BOPPIN', NO SINGING, NOTHING!!!! DO YOU LOVE SPENDING $8 A BEER?

SO HE DECIDED TO ALMOST KILL US BY CROSSING THE MEDIAN TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY, UNTIL WE ALL PANICKED, AND SHIT OURSELVES. AT THIS POINT WE WEREN'T EVEN AT THE CONCERT YET!!! I WAS NOT MISSING POISON BECAUSE I DIED...............

WELL BESIDES THAT IT WAS GOOD. WE HAD FUN PAYING NO ATTENTION TO ERIC LOL....

WE SAW MEG THERE SHE WAS HER USUAL EXCITED HYPER SELF LOL, SHE IS ALWAYS A RIOT.

SO HOPEFULLY PICTURES TO DISPLAY OUR NIGHT TO COME..................

TAG YOUR IT

2007-07-02T15:03:00.000-04:00

1. Go to Wikipedia and put in your birthday, without the year, in the search bar.

2. List on your blog 5 events, 4 births, 3 deaths and 1 holiday that happens(ed) on your birthday.

3. Then tag 5 more friends to do it!

EVENTS:
1494 - Christopher Columbus lands in Jamaica

1776 - Rhode Island becomes the first American colony to renounce allegiance to King George III.

1865 - Abraham Lincoln buried in Springfield, Illinois, three weeks after his assassination.

1904 - Construction begins by the United States on the Panama Canal.

1953 - Ernest Hemingway is awarded the Pulitzer Prize for The Old Man and the Sea.

BIRTH:
1820 - Julia Tyler, First Lady of the United States (d. 1889)

1864 - Marie Booth, the third daughter of William and Catherine Booth (d. 1937)

1929 - Audrey Hepburn, Belgian actress (d. 1993)

1940 - Robin Cook, American novelist

DEATH:

1737 - Eustace Budgell, English writer (b. 1686)

1984 - Bob Clampett, American cartoonist (b. 1913)

2001 - Bonnie Lee Bakley, American murder victim (b. 1956)

HOLIDAY:

International Firefighters' Day.

I TAG DANIELLE, SAM, JESS, LYSS, MEG

HOW INSULTING!!!!!!

2007-06-29T11:32:00.000-04:00

Mingle² - Online Dating

MORE POISON...GOTTA LOVE THEM!!

2007-06-28T11:41:00.001-04:00

2007-06-28T11:35:00.000-04:00

FOR YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE

2007-06-28T11:16:00.001-04:00

IT'S SOOOOO HOT !!!

2007-06-28T11:04:00.000-04:00

2007-06-27T16:33:00.000-04:00

2 DIFFERENT VERSION, MAKES YOU WONDER???

2007-06-27T15:14:00.000-04:00

OK I POSTED MY HOROSCOPE FROM TODAY, FROM 2 DIFFERENT SOURCES.....SO WHICH ONE IS CLOSE TO THE TRUTH? GUESS I CANT RELY ON THE STARS ANYMORE...........TIME FOR THERAPY.

Taurus (Apr 20 - May 20)
You may have recently been involved in an intense negotiation or even a fight, but others may not even realize that you were struggling for dominance. There are still leftover conflicts occurring within your imagination. Bring your fears into the open and convert your secrets into positive actions.

Taurus
Daily extended (by Astrology.com)Your snap decision to defend a friend made a big impact on onlookers, and people are starting to see you in a new light. Did you even know that you had so much courage? Your intimidation factor has increased, and there might be some jealousy about how much influence you suddenly have. But don't worry about it -- you earned this extra authority, so enjoy it. You took the risk by standing up for a person you believed in, and you deserve the reward

2007-06-26T13:10:00.001-04:00

2007-06-26T13:08:00.000-04:00

THURSDAY NIGHT KARAOKE

2007-06-26T09:02:00.000-04:00

href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_scwteVHLW6U/RoEQGgpA0MI/AAAAAAAAABc/1mXmTOH_47s/s1600-h/thursnight+020.jpg">

BRAYDON AT CANOBIE LAKE PARK

2007-06-26T08:54:00.000-04:00

2007-06-25T16:59:00.000-04:00

ALOT TO CATCH UP ON............

2007-06-25T16:47:00.000-04:00

WELL I GUESS I HAVE ALOT TO BLOG ABOUT....

WELL SO FAR I HAVE SPENT MY WEEKENDS AT GRADUATION PARTIES, AND CANOBIE LAKE.
ALSO WENT FOR KAROAKE WITH DANIELLE AND SAM. WE HAD A 50TH B-DAY PARTY FOR MY MOTHER IN LAW. AND THIS WEEKEND ME ,SAM, JESS, SAM'S SISTER, AND ERIC ARE GOING TO SEE POISON.

I WILL POST PICS OF SOME OF THESE EVENTS ABOVE.

NO DRAMA LATELY WHICH IS GOOD....OTHER THAN SOME PSYCHO LESBIAN, BUT HER NAME ISN'T WORTH MENTIONING........

I HAVEN'T REALY FELT LIKE BLOGGING LATELY..HENCE ALL THE STUPID SURVEYS I HAVE BEEN USING AS FILLER.

2007-06-21T15:43:00.001-04:00

You've Changed 76% in 10 Years

Compared to who you were ten years ago, you've changed a great deal.
In fact, you're probably in a completely different phase of your life - and very happy about it!

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

2007-06-21T15:40:00.000-04:00

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion:

You have medium extroversion.
You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party.
Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences.
But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time."

Conscientiousness:

You have medium conscientiousness.
You're generally good at balancing work and play.
When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done.
But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it.

Agreeableness:

You have low agreeableness.
Your self interest comes first, and others come later, if at all.
In general, you feel that people are not to be trusted.
And you're skeptical that anyone else really feels differently.

Neuroticism:

You have medium neuroticism.
You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.
Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.
Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of.

Openness to experience:

Your openness to new experiences is medium.
You are generally broad minded when it come to new things.
But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it.
You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

The Five Factor Personality Test

2007-06-21T14:50:00.001-04:00

You Are 42% Pure

You're not so innocent... in fact, you're quite unpure.
You have seen and experienced a lot. And you're no worse for the wear!

The 100 Question Purity Test

2007-06-13T16:07:00.001-04:00

Your Cell Phone Etiquette is 58% Bad, 42% Good

Your cell phone manners are simply okay. Sometimes you can be very considerate.
But when you are in the middle of an important conversation, all rules go out the window!

How's Your Cell Phone Etiquette?

2007-06-13T16:05:00.001-04:00

You Are Strawberry Kiss Lip Gloss

When it comes to life, you want the best of everything:
The best clothes, the best friends, the best guy - and you usually get all three.

You impress most people you meet with your genuine class and style
Strawberry is a classic, admired flavor that goes with many things. Sound familar?

What Flavor Lip Gloss Are You?

2007-06-13T16:00:00.001-04:00

Your 80s Theme Song Is:

1999 by Prince

What's Your 80s Theme Song?

2007-06-13T15:58:00.001-04:00

You Are a Lemon Margarita

Sour, tangy, and overpowering, you tend to give people a jolt back into reality.
While you don't sugar coat things, you're honest - which is actually quite refreshing.

What Flavor Margarita Are You?

WACKY WEDNESDAY

2007-06-13T15:54:00.001-04:00

Your Boobies' Names Are...

Dessert and Dinner

Boobie Name Generator

FRIDAY!!!!! WHOO HOO

2007-06-08T10:25:00.000-04:00

OK SO ITS FRIDAY! THE WEATHER OURTSIDE IS PERFECT, NOT TOO HOT NOT TOO COLD.
POLANS FOR TODAY ARE TO LEAVE WORK AT 12:30 AND GO TO THE MALL WITH DANIELLE. gO HOME DO SOME YARD WORK OR HOUSEWORK. THEN MEET WITH MY SISTER IN LAW ABOUT A 50TH B-DAY PARTY.
THEN SATURDAY DO SOME MORE CLEANING, AND GO TO MY GODDAUGHTER OLIVIA'S DANCE RECITAL. POSSIBLY GO FOR DRINKS AFTER WITH ERIC AND SOME FRIENDS.

NOT TOO MUCH ELSE GOING ON, OTHER THAN THEY DIDNT PAY ME A WHOLE WEEKS WORTH OF PAY, BECAUSE MY TIMESHEET WASNT ENTERED....

SO THEY ARE TRYING TO CUT ME A CHECK!!!!!!!!!

THERE GOES SOME OF MY SHOPPING MONEY.

TICK TOCK THURSDAY

2007-06-07T14:48:00.000-04:00

OK SO ITS ANOTHER LONG DAY THE PHONES ARE SLOW...CONVERSATION IS SLOW. I FIND MYSELF CONSTANTLY LOOKNIG AT THE CLOCK......

SO LASTNIGHT WAS UNEVENTFUL, CAME HOME ATE DINER AND WATCHED ALL MY CHILDREN. TOOK A SHOWER WITH BRAYDON AND IRONED MY CLOTHES. THIS MORNING I WOKE UP LATE AT 6:53AM OOPS I WAS SUPPOSED TO GET UP AT 6:30 AND LEAVE MY HOUSE AT 7:15. I WAS STILL ON TIME TO WORK AFTER STOPPING FOR GAS AND COFFEE. YESTERDAY ERIC TOOK BRAYDON TO THE DR'S WITH HIM AND OF COURSE EMBARRASSES THE CRAP OUT OF ERIC ( WHICH I LOVE). ERIC WAS ON THE SCALE AND BRAYDON SAID TO THE NURSE. " YEAH HES GROWIN UP REAL BIG"
AND THEN THEY WERE WALKING INTO TEH EXAM ROOM AND BRAYDON TELL THE NURSEE, " MY DAD EATS EVERYTHIN" LOL CRACKS ME UP.

ANYWAY THIS IS MY LAST 8-5:30 SHIFT FOR THIS WEEK.......SO I LEAVE AT 12:30 TOMORROW!!!!YEAH AND IM GOING TO MEET DANIELLE AT THE MALL.

WELL THATS ABOUT IT TIL TOMORROW, OVER AND OUT

AMANDALYN'S BAND CONCERT

2007-06-06T09:59:00.000-04:00

WELL LASTNIGHT I HAD MY SISTER BAND CONCERT WHICH WASN'T TOO BAD. IT STARTED AT 7:30 AND WAS DONE AT 8:30. THE WHOLE TIME BRAYDON WAS DANCING AROUND, AND PLAYING WITH BABY BOBBY. THEN AFTER EACH SONG BRAYDON WOULD CLAP AND SAY" WOO MANALYN, YOUR A GENIUS!" "WOO MANALYN YOU ROCK!" THEN HE WOULD SAY " THAT'S MY FAVORITE SONG, DO HAVE THAT IN YOUR CAR MOM?" LOL OBVIOUSLY MY KID.....BECAUSE ONLY I WOULD ACT LIKE THAT IN PUBLIC!

FUNNY THINGS

2007-06-06T09:38:00.000-04:00

OK SO I HAVE TO POST ALL THESE FUNNY THINGS THAT BRAYDON HAS SAID LATELY, BECAUSE THEY ARE TOO FUNNY YO FORGET.

"A MAN GOTTA DO WHAT A MAN GOTTA DO" LOL REFERENCING RAKING THE LAWN...........

ICE CUBE" YOU CAN DO IT, PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT" WHILE BUMPING HIS BUTT AGAINST THE SHOWER DOOR......

"MY DAD DREAMS OF NAKED WOMEN"..........

"AMANDALYN HAS A BOYFRIEND?!?!, OH MY GOD!!!! SHE HAS TO PUT HER BACK INTO IT" LOL REFERENCING MY SISTER HAVING A BOYFRIEND.........

TUESDAY, TUESDAY

2007-06-05T16:26:00.002-04:00

SO IT'S TUESDAY AND GORGEOUS OUTSIDE, AND WHERE AM I? AT WORK FOR ANOTHER HOUR.
THEN I CANT EVEN ENJOY THE WEATHER WHEN I GET HOME, BECAUSE MY SISTER HAS A BAND CONCERT. SO IT WILL BE A VERY BORING NIGHT FOR ME.

ON THE OTHER HAND I HAVE BEEN ANNOYED BY ERIC ALL WEEK, NOTHING DIFFERENT THERE.
FIRST HE GAVE ME A HARD TIME ON FRIDAY ABOUT GOING OUT W/ DANIELLE.....
THEN HE FOUND OUT YESTERDAY THAT SOME OF HIS REPAIRS ON THE MUSTANG WEREN'T COVERED. SO HE CALLED ME BITCHING THAT THEY TOLD HIM THEY WOULD ONLY CHARGE HIM $700.00 FOR THE PARTS. WHY THE HELL ARE YOU GETTING MAD AT ME? I DIDNT TELL YOU TO PEEL OUT YOUR TIRES LIKE AN IDIOT AND BURN YOUR CLUTCH, FLYWHEEL, AND TRANSMISSION............
BUT IF YOU ASK HIM HE'LL SAY THAT THE CLUTCH WAS GOING ANYWAY. (YEAH OKAY)

THEN HE HAD THE NERVE TO ASK IF HE COULD PUT THE CHARGES ON MY DAD'S CREDIT CARD...UM HELLO OK FOR ME TO DO, NOT YOU.

SO I WAS STUCK HAVING TO BE BROUGHT AND PICKED UP FROM WORK...
TODAY I DROVE IN BUT HE GOT A RIDE TO GET MY CAR, HE SHOULD HAVE THE MUSTANG BY THE END OF THE DAY THANK GOD....

THEN HE DECIDED THAT HE WAS GOING TO TAKE THE DOGS SWIMMING, WELL TRAMP CUT A PAD ON HER FOOT.
HE CALLS ME AND ASKS ME WHAT TO DO SO I TELL HIM TO CALL THE VET, OH GREAT MORE MONEY HE SAYS...
WELL IF YOU DONT WNAT HER TO GO TO THE VET THEN WHEN IT GETS INFECTED AND HER FOOT HAS TO BE CUT OFF, THAT WILL BE CHEAPER!!! IDIOT

OK AND 1 MORE THING ABOUT ERIC TODAY....HERE WAS OUR TEXT MESSAGE CONVERSATION:

ERIC: WHEN DID YOU BUY MEATLOAF?

ME: AT LIL GEN LASTNIGHT

ERIC:OH GOOD LUCK WITH THAT

ME: DID YOU HAVE SOME?

ERIC: NO I ONLY EAT MY GOURMET CHEF'S MEATLOAF...

ME: LOL

ERIC: I EAT AT AMANDA'S DINER

ME: WELL ITS UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT

ERIC: WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? SOMEONE ELSE BETWEEN YOUR LEGS?

ERIC: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

RING RING....MY PHONE AT WORK...

THE IDIOT WAS TALKING ABOUT MY CROTCH BEING THE DINER, I THOUGHT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT THE MEATLAOF STILL..............

CAN YOU SAY PSYCHO?

TUESDAY, TUESDAY

2007-06-05T16:26:00.001-04:00

2007-06-05T13:49:00.001-04:00

What's Your Best Quality? Your Result: Out-Going Your best quality is out-going! People like you because you are fun to be around and no one ever knows what you will do next. Also you are not afraid to say or do whatever you want.
Loving
Ambitious
Personality
Intelligence
Sense of Humor
What's Your Best Quality? Take More Quizzes

2007-06-05T13:15:00.001-04:00

What type of partier are you? Your Result: The Socialite You like only the best liquors, the latest trendy martini's, or the finest single-malt scotch. You are not one for the 'dive bar', you prefer classy lounges filled with model-quality people. When intoxicated, you flirt, but are coy and unattainable, you make your suitors WORK for it.
Bar Social Butterfly
The Lurker
Hardcore drunk
Bar Slut
The designated driver
The rock-star party animal
What type of partier are you? Make Your Own Quiz

2007-06-05T13:10:00.001-04:00

What type of person do you attract? Your Result: You attract Yuppies! You attract the very well-dressed, job oriented type of people. They usually have their finances together, are 'middle of the road' on most topics, generally happy with the 'main-stream' of things. If it is stability you are after, these are good people to attract, if you seek adventure, it may be time for an overhaul.
You attract geeks!
You attract unstable people!
You attract artsy people!
You attract models!
You attract rednecks!
What type of person do you attract? Quizzes for MySpace

2007-06-05T13:02:00.001-04:00

What random lyric are you? Your Result: Staind "If you just walked away, what could I really say? Would it matter anyway, it wouldn't change how you feel. I am the mess you chose, the closet you can not close. The devil in you I suppose, cuz the wounds never heal.
Charlie Robinson
The Fray
Fergie
Greenday
Good Charlotte
Simple Plan
Bowling for Soup
What random lyric are you? Create a Quiz

2007-06-04T14:53:00.000-04:00

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2007-06-01T15:15:00.001-04:00

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THANK GOD ITS FREAKIN' FRIDAY!!!

2007-06-01T11:23:00.000-04:00

WELL TODAY HAS BEEN UNEVENTFUL AT THIS POINT THE PHONES ARE SLOW, BUT WE STILL HAVE SOME DAMN MAGAZINES............

I'M GOING TO GO OUT FOR A BIT WITH DANIELLE TONIGHT, WITH OF COURSE HASSLE FROM ERIC. BUT THAT WAS TO BE EXPECTED. THEN HE TRIES TO MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY, LIKE WHEN ARE WE GOING TO DO SOMETHING WITH BRAYDON?

FIRST OF ALL ASSHOLE WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GO THE ZOO WITH HIM LAST WEEKEND, BUT YOU WERE TOO TIRED.....

SO NICE TRY ON MAKING ME FEEL GUILTY, MY KID IS NOT DEPRIVED IN ANYWAY, AND ISN'T WITHOUT ATTENTION.

UUUGGGHHHHH

REMEMBERING THE GOODTIMES

2007-06-01T11:19:00.001-04:00

MORE GOOD TIMES

2007-06-01T10:22:00.000-04:00

2007-06-01T10:12:00.001-04:00

I am 75% Girly!!

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2007-06-01T10:06:00.000-04:00

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2007-05-31T16:54:00.001-04:00

You Are Thong Panties

Woman, you are one hell of a ride!
You're a total wild child - and you live for crazy times.
Men are attracted to you like flies to honey, even though they know they should stay away.
You need a expert cowboy who can keep in tune with your free spirit!

What Kind of Panties Are You?

2007-05-31T16:50:00.001-04:00

Your Kissing Technique Is: Perfect

Your kissing technique is amazing - and you know it.
You have the confidence to make the first move.
And you always seem to know what kissing style is going to work best.
Sometimes you're passionate, sometimes you're a tease. And you're always amazing!

Are You a Good Kisser?

2007-05-31T16:47:00.001-04:00

Your Love Song Is

Wonderwall by Oasis

"I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now"

You know what you want - but does that person want you?

What Love Song Are You?

2007-05-31T14:59:00.000-04:00

2007-05-31T14:55:00.001-04:00

"WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS, WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS"

2007-05-31T10:31:00.000-04:00

OK.....SO LYSS CALLED MY PHONE LAST NIGHT AND LEFT ME A MESSAGE TO CALL HER.......SO I DID CALL HER AFTER I HAD TALKED TO SAM....

AND WE BASICALLY DISCUSSED THE WHOLE ISSUE, AND THAT JEN MADE IT COMPLETELY WORSE.

SO EXCUSE ME A MOMENT WHILE I ACT 5.....

HA HA HA JEN YOUR IN TROUBLE, HA HA YOU SUCK, WE WIN ,WE WIN!!!!!

OK I'M BACK GLAD I GOT THAT OUT OF MY SYSTEM.

SO I TOLD HER THAT I WAS PISSED AND SAID SOME HARSH STUFF IN THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT, BUT THAT TOWARDS THE END IT WAS BASICALLY ABOUT JEN.

SO JEN IF YOU READ THIS LYSS AND I ARE COOL, AND SO ARE LYSS AND SAM...

SO I GUESS YOU WILL JUST HAVE TO DEAL AND SHARE HER...

AND YOU PROVED THAT YOU CAN'T BEAT US BY DELETING YOUR BLOG.
SO SCORE IS :
US=1 YOU=0

BITCH GONNA GET SLAPPED UP

2007-05-30T13:53:00.000-04:00

OK I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE THE HELL TO START AGAIN.....

FIRST OF ALL JEN YOU FUCKING COW, YOU AREN'T LYS ONLY FRIEND SO STOP ASSUMING THAT WE ARE REFERENCING YOU ALL THE TIME SINCE NICOLE STARTED TO JOIN IN ON THE COMMENTS. AND THIS ISN'T EVEN ABOUT LYS ANYMORE THIS IS ABOUT YOU CONSTANTLY TALKING SHIT...

SO YOU BETTER STOP EATING THOSE WINGS AND GET TO THE GYM, CAUSE THE NEXT TIME I SEE YOU. I'M GONNA DROP KICK YOUR ASS. AND I'M NOT ALL TALK BELIEVE ME.... ASK LYSS SHE TELL YOU WHAT I'M CAPABLE OF.

AND MAYBE BEFORE YOU DEFEND YOUR FRIEND YOU SHOULD READ HER BLOG MORE THOROUGHLY...CASE SHE SAID LIKE 5 TIMES WHILE J WAS AT THE CAPE, ADAMS FRIEND SLEPT OVER AND THEY KISSED. AND THAT SHE KNEW SHE WAS GOING TO FUCK IT UP WITH J.

IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR LAME ASS PICS ON LYSS BLOG....WE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THE FUCK THOSE PEOPLE ARE AND DON'T CARE.

SO YOU WHORE WHORE WHORE.......SHUT THE FUCK UP, CAUSE I KNOW ALOT OF PEOPLE THAT WILL DO ANYTHING FOR 20 BUCKS....ONCE AGAIN ASK LYSS SHE KNOWS MY HUSBANDS GHETTO FAMILY..........

" DO NOT DISTURB"

2007-05-30T09:57:00.000-04:00

OK I WAS STARTING TO FEEL BAD FOR LYSS...BECAUSE SHE SEEMED UPSET THAT WE WERE MAD AT HER. WELL AFTER READING HER BLOG AND HER COMMENTS FROM HER FRIENDS. I REALLY REALLY DON'T CARE ANYMORE ABOUT HER FEELINGS....

IF I HEAR DOWN THE ROAD THAT SHE IS IN LOVE WITH A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT GUY IN A MONTH..I WILL PISS MY PANTS LAUGHING. BECAUSE SHE IS IN LOVE WITH ANY GUY THAT GIVES HER ANY ATTENTION...........SO PATHETIC.

OOOHH ME JAY AND MARY HAD BREAKFAST...OOOHHH WE ALL SLEEP TOGETHER.....

OOOHHH WATCH OUT HE MIGHT BE ON AMERICA'S MOST WANTED.........YOU RUSH INTO SHIT TOO QUICK

AND JEN, SHE'S A FAT COW...THAT RIGHT BITCH I CAN CALL YOU FAT BECAUSE I'M NOT SO I CAN THROW BOULDERS YOUR WAY...FUCK STONES....

2007-05-29T12:40:00.000-04:00

GWEN & AKON

JESS AND SAM

2007-05-29T12:38:00.000-04:00

SAM AND I

2007-05-29T12:00:00.000-04:00

JESS AND I HAVE TO GO PEE PEE LOL

2007-05-29T11:49:00.000-04:00

WE ARE TRYING TO SPELL GWEN

2007-05-29T11:22:00.000-04:00

BEFORE CONCERT

I know I'm a slacker!!!!!

2007-05-29T10:24:00.000-04:00

Ok so I have been totally slcking o nthis blog..apparently I only like to blog when I am raging mad......lol

So let me catch up on things....

On Saturday May 19 I went to KISS 108 Concert with Danielle...even though it drizzled the whole day we had a blast..we drank in the parking lot smoked alot of cigarettes and just bullshitted...
Then we get inside the Tweeter Center only to fibd out thatwe didn't have covered seating...
But we managed since it wasn't pouring out..luckily a woman next to us had 2 extra pnochos..lol
Boy did we look like idiots, the wholetime we were putting them on we kept looking at eachother laughing. We did run into a bit of a problem getting served, but we managed to ask some guy(younger than us) to grabus some beer........can you say LOSERS!!!!!LOL Well I guess when it comes down to beerit doesn't matter how you get it, just that you do.

So we left a little early finished the beer in the car, and went to cooky's had a bite to eat, and met up with the boys...
Eric and I fought...nothing new there, excpet made me rethink why the hell I stayed...but I guess Im a coward, and too scared to start over, or disrupt my son.

Then Wednesday Sam, Jess and I went to Gween and Akon....we had a wicked good time there too...we talked to BOB on the way up and drank in the parking lot, talked to BOB again....lol

We totally couldn't stop laughing inside, everytime I talk to BOB it feels the first time..but thats what I love.

And if yuo don't believe wehad fun take a look at the pics....lol

So Friday I cleaned my house a bit, and then Saturday I was up at 6:45am thanks to Franklin...I didnt bother going back to sleep. So I jumped in the shower and basically did yard work till 9am and then I went to Wal-Mart and Lowe's with Braydon...back home to finish yard work. Then we helped Amy move into her apartment. Then back home to more yard work..needless to say by the end of the day I was wiped out. Sunday I had a appointment at a Spa for a herbal body wrap with a coldstone face massage, then a 30min therapuetic massage. I tried something new, but Ill probably neve do it again. Ill still with a Swedish massage, and a facial any day.

We had plans to go out Sunday night, a few peoplt couldn't make it. Which usually sucks because I hate going out when its just me and Eric its so boring, but luckily Amy came out, and Danielel and Josh showed up later..

It was very quiet out, we went to Brickhouse, adn Eric was trying to hook Amy up with this guy, I thought she was going to kill him... but everyone remained alive at the end of the night......lol

Then yesterday I went with my mom and other family members ..(too many to mention.)to the Veterans Cemetary to put flowers at my grandfather site, and we visited a few others there as well...
Then we drove to Captain Jacks to eat, then went to Matunick beach to let the kids play....
Of course you know Braydon didnt get dirty....excpet he actually got his shoes wet in the ocean which was the surprise in itself....AND HERE WAS THE BABY CRAWLING IN THE WATER AND SAND...
So all in all it was a good day didnt get home till 6:45....and I took a bath with Braydon. Then we all watched TV and wento bed.....

WE'RE SO VAIN, WE PROBABLY THINK THIS BLOG IS ABOUT US, WE'RE SO VAN!!!!

2007-05-25T16:58:00.000-04:00

OKAY ITS FRIDAY....DAY STARTED OFF SLOW.
I THINK DRAMA HAS SUBSIDED FOR NOW, UNLESS JEN OPENS HER MOUTH. AND I ATHINK LYSS AND I ARE PASSED ALL THE BS. BUT I AM A LITTEL ANNOYED THAT LYSS DIDNT SCOLD JEN IN HER BLOG LIKE SHE SCOLDED US....
AS FARAS IM CONCERNED SHE WASJUST AS BAD AS US..I UNDERSTAND THAT SHE DEFENDED LYSS, AND THATS WHY SHE GETS KUDOS. BUT LYSS SHOULD HAVE SAID YOU KNOW JEN DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT THEM..YOU REALLY DON'T KNOW THEM THAT WELL EITHER. BUT I GUESS SHE ONLY KNOWS WHAT SHE READS AND WHAT LYSS TELLS HER!!!!

I AM STILL MAKING MY BLOG PUBLIC AFTER I GET PAID FROM ALYSSA...

ANYWAY, SOME OF US GOT TO LEAVE AT 3:30 TODAY, BUT NOT I BECAUSE I JUST STARTED. NO BIDEAL THOUGH BECAUSE WE GET TO CHOOSE ANOTHER DAY, PLUS THEY PAY YOU.

WELL BESIDES ALL OF THAT NOTHING TOO EXCITING GOING ON FOR THE WEEKEND, I GUESS I WILL JUSTTAKE IT AS IT COMES.....

GET OVER YOURSELF!!!!!!!

2007-05-24T13:49:00.000-04:00

OK...TODAY HAS BEEN PRETTY EXCITING DRAMA WISE.....THOUGHT THIS WAS ALL OVER WITH BETWEEN ME AND LYS, BUT HER FATASS FRIEND JEN HAD TO KEEP BRINGING IT UP.

1. I'M VAIN AS HELL AND PROUD OF IT..SO WHILE ITS FLATTERING THAT YOU THINK THAT I HAVE CHEATED ON MY HUSBAND WITH 30-40 PEOPLE( DIDNT HAPPEN ) IT WAS TWO PEOPLE WITHIN 5 YRS...
OK MAYBE I SHOULD HAVE DIVORCED HIM WHEN I WAS GOING TO, BUT I HAD MY REASONS FOR STAYING, AND HAVENT CHEATED SINCE....

2. I'M NOT ROLLIN IN THE DOUGH FATTY...........BUT SORRY IF YOU ARE STILL JEALOUS.

3. CAN'T BE SAVING TOO MUCH MONEY LIVING WITH MAMA IF YOUR CAR IS GONNA GET REPOED, AND I THOGUHT YOU LIVED WITH DAN BEFORE BUT HE DIDNT WANT TO LIVE THER ANYMORE WITH YOU. SO THATS WHY YOU LIVE WITH MOM.

4. I NEVER SAID I WASNT A SLUT...LOL

HOPE YOU DON'T HAVE TO WALK TO GATOR'S.....CAUSE REPOE GOT YOUR CAR!!!!!

LOL LOSER

2007-05-24T12:23:00.000-04:00

I am 67% Slutty!!

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2007-05-24T11:55:00.000-04:00

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2007-05-24T11:54:00.001-04:00

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2007-05-24T11:50:00.001-04:00

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FUCK ME .......YOU FUCK YOURSLEF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-05-21T10:19:00.001-04:00

Well I am sure that most of you know already how spiteful I can be by stories that I've told and things that I've done......

Well apparently Lyss wasn't paying attention...she has no clue what is in store for her.

She thought I was scary mean at CVS....LOL!!

Well miss Martha fucking Stewart wannabe maybe you should have paid more attention to proper etiquette......so you would know that it's not Right to wait till the last fucking minute to cancel on someone... and if you are going to lie about why you couldn't go please keep it consistent you dumb bitch. First we hear it's a money problem.....but I noticed you are going out this weekend with Jen..

Then it was a babysitting issue, but hey were was your daughter Friday night?

Not home.

I told you about these tickets before I went on vacation in April, then confirmed with you like 3 times. and you keep saying can't wait to go sounds like fun.....then I confirmed with you the week of, again no fuckin indication that you didn't want to go or couldn't go.....12:30 comes around the day of, you didn't answer my phone call but you answered a text message...no wonder I thought something shady was going on....too much of a fuckin pussy to answer the phone and talk to me?

It really isn't a money issue as to why I'm pissed, its that I could've made other arrangements for the ticket....you couldn't get a babysitter last minute...well I couldn't get rid of a 60.00 ticket last minute either....

And don't start saying all that single mother bullshit either...cause you chose to be that way....you knew what was going to happen to you financially, and maybe if you weren't such a bitch to Matt, he wouldn't be an asshole about paying you. And if you didn't make a big deal about Mary staying with his parents...you would have a sitter.

And once again it's not our fault that we don't know whats going on with you, and that you once again choose to talk to your other friends instead of us......

Maybe if we knew what was going on with you, we wouldn't be so quick to assume the worst. But seriously think about it...you haven't been around since Jay....

And don't act like he's the Love of your fucking life...when you are making out with other dudes....

So if you could blow him off to make out with someone else......then you can make time for us.